Immy, come hither!

Happy Valentine's Day, everyone! If you participated in the Secret Cupid activity, click here to exchange gifts!

Vday -2010 Locked on 2/30/20
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Antilles
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Immy, come hither!

Postby Antilles » Tue Feb 16, 2010 8:00 pm

I did a huge amount of research for this V-day gift. I read your entire journal. I read through about 50% of everything you've posted, actually - no mean feat, considering the amount of those there are. :lick: And by the end of it all, I knew... pretty much nothing. No real name, no special interests... even your gender I'm not entirely sure of.

And so, my good sir, I hereby salute your mysterious ways. Ninja-like, you come and go as you please, dropping a brief word, or a hint, before disappearing without a trace...

You may now insert a fart joke or two here. Or Rorikon, if you prefer. Traditions must be observed, after all.

Code: Select all

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*                                                                     *
*        LLLLL              EEEEEEEEEEEEEE      PPPPPPPPPPP           *
*        LLLLL              EEEEEEEEEEEEEE      PPPPPPPPPPPP          *
*        LLLLL              EEEEE               PPPPP   PPPPP         *
*        LLLLL              EEEEE               PPPPP   PPPPP         *
*        LLLLL              EEEEEEEEEEEEEE      PPPPPPPPPPPP          *
*        LLLLL              EEEEEEEEEEEEEE      PPPPPPPPPPP           *
*        LLLLL              EEEEE               PPPPP                 *
*        LLLLL              EEEEE               PPPPP                 *
*        LLLLLLLLLLLLL  **  EEEEEEEEEEEEEE  **  PPPPP                 *
*        LLLLLLLLLLLLL  **  EEEEEEEEEEEEEE  **  PPPPP                 *
*                                                                     *
***********************************************************************
* LOWER ELEMENTS POLICE - CRIMINAL INVESTIGATION SYSTEM               *
* REVISION 10.9.1138                                                  *
* CREATED AND MAINTAINED BY LEP CONSULTANT FOALY                      *
***********************************************************************
***********************************************************************
**  WARNING: MATERIALS OBTAINED FROM THIS SYSTEM MAY BE CLASSIFIED.  **
**  UNAUTHORIZED ACCESS, DISTRIBUTION, REPRODUCTION, EXAMINATION, OR **
**  CONSIDERATION OF CLASSIFIED MATERIALS WILL BE PROSECUTED TO THE  **
**  FULLEST EXTENT OF THE LAW.  BY USING THIS SYSTEM, YOU HEREBY     **
**  INDICATE YOUR ACKNOWLEDGEMENT OF THE ABOVE.                      **
***********************************************************************
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>LOGIN
>USERNAME: TKELP
>PASSWORD: *********
>ACCESS KEY: ePIcCentAUR
>SECONDARY ACCESS KEY: smartErThaNYou
>TERTIARY ACCESS KEY: DARVIT YOU STUCK UP DONKEY
>ERROR: ACCESS KEY UNRECOGNIZED
>TERTIARY ACCESS KEY: prAIseTheGENius

>ACCESS KEY ACCEPTED.  LOGGING INTO LEP MAINFRAME, PLEASE STAND BY...
>ACCESSING SERVER...
>TRANSMITTING AUTHENTICATION DATA...SUCCESS!

>NOW LOGGED INTO: SERVER CABLNE_14
>07:14:26

_______________________________________________________________________

>SEARCH

>    What do you want to search?  Press:
>
>    1 - Criminal Records
>    2 - Civil Records
>    3 - Traffic Records
>    4 - Warrant History
>   
>    To search more than one database, separate by spaces.

>    1 2

>    Now seaching all Criminal and Civil records.  Please enter query.

>    IMMORTAL

>    Searching... please wait...
>    105689764 records found.  View results? (Y/N)

>    N

>    Search again? (Y/N)

>    Y

>    Database to search?

>    4

>    Now searching all Warrant History records.  Please enter query.

>    IMMORTAL

>    Searching... please wait...
>    1 record found.  Did you mean "Immortality"?  (185939305 results - Y/N)

>    N

>    View results?  (Y/N)

>    Y

>    ******************************************************************
>    *  LEP Criminal Warrant
>    *  Issued 03/16/3635
>    *  Human Investigation Unit
>    ******************************************************************
>    *  NAME:     Unknown
>    *  ALIAS:    Immortal, Immy, Lucifer, (?)
>    *  AGE:      15
>    *  SEX:      M
>    *  DOB:      3/24/1994 HUMAN
>    *            1/2/3621 FAIRY
>    *  EYES:     Black
>    *  HAIR:     Black
>    *  HEIGHT:   164 cm
>    *
>    *  SUBJECT HISTORY:
>    *  Birthplace Taiwan, current whereabouts unknown.  Human IQ tests
>    *  reveal high intellect by human standards, though merely average
>    *  by equivalent fairy standards.  Consistent interests shown in
>    *  human stories depicting magic, especially mud fairies (wizards
>    *  by human convention.)
>    *      See references:  Sword of Truth, The Dresden Files,
>    *                       Harry Potter, Bartimaeus
>    *
>    *  Fairy/Mud Fairy obesession coupled with high IQ was deemed valid
>    *  cause for closer surveillance.  Suspect has proved elusive and
>    *  difficult to track; however, it is believed that he spends most
>    *  of his time in Asia.
>    *
>    *  Links to Artemis Fowl or Minerva Paradizo speculated but
>    *  unproven. Age groups, interests, and mental facilities fall
>    *  into comparable range with both; however, no direct links to
>    *  their activities have been found.  This is most likely due to 
>    *  the suspect's secretive nature. 
>    *
>    *  All attempts to locate the subject thus far have failed; the 
>    *  only hints to his identity and location have been derived from 
>    *  IP records and cryptic postings on the human internet.  Suspect
>    *  should be considered dangerous and is not to be approached.
>    *
>    *  Relevant material:  CLASSIFIED
>    *
>    ******************************************************************

>  LOGOUT

>  LOGGING OUT...
>  SUCCESSFUL LOGOUT AT 08:03:56
>  CLEARING CACHE DATA...
>  RESETTING TERMINAL...


Yeah, it's late, and it's not much... but it was fun to write up. Happy Valentine's Day!
"oh sharkie is so evul" -sharkie
"Oh sure, ANTILLES gets love and hugs and confetti. What do I get? The halfway empty coffee carafe...and someone left the creamer out...it has lumps in it. I hate you all." -IzzyTehMuze
"OMGWOOT I COULD FEED 33 HUNGRY WEASELS" -Nick

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IzzyTehMuse
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Re: Immy, come hither!

Postby IzzyTehMuse » Wed Feb 17, 2010 12:19 am

You... are freakin' brilliant, man.
"Suppose we have only dreamed, or made up, all of those things—trees and grass and sun and moon and stars and Aslan himself. Suppose we have. Then all I can say is that, in that case, the made-up things seem a good deal more important than the real ones[." - Puddleglum, The Silver Chair

"I have had to believe a great deal in God because I have lost my belief in men." -Elias, Noli Me Tangere

"The price of freedom is learning to coexist with that which you hate." -- My
cousin.
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*rapes* I love you, Izzy. :P

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Kitsy
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Re: Immy, come hither!

Postby Kitsy » Wed Feb 17, 2010 1:54 pm

Omg LOL. That is such a good Immy present!
Image
Silly little foul black twisted heart I am!
http://superkits.tumblr.com

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Lime Yay
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Re: Immy, come hither!

Postby Lime Yay » Wed Feb 17, 2010 4:36 pm

This was really fantastic, lol. Very clever and also very funny. It's my fav.

!lime ayy
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Thanks to Diana for the sweetest (erm... sourest?) signature ever!

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Antilles
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Re: Immy, come hither!

Postby Antilles » Wed Feb 17, 2010 4:54 pm

Heh, thanks guys. When this Secret Cupid thing was announced, I actually came up with this as a backup plan; I originally had a plot for a short fanfic sketched up. But time constraints pretty much killed that, and I think this suits Immy better anyway. ;)

EDIT: Fun Trivia: I figured there was no reason for fairy and human calendars to be the same, so I made up new dates for the fairies. I set their new year to be on the first day of spring - considering how much they care for nature, it just seemed fitting.
"oh sharkie is so evul" -sharkie
"Oh sure, ANTILLES gets love and hugs and confetti. What do I get? The halfway empty coffee carafe...and someone left the creamer out...it has lumps in it. I hate you all." -IzzyTehMuze
"OMGWOOT I COULD FEED 33 HUNGRY WEASELS" -Nick

Immortal
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Re: Immy, come hither!

Postby Immortal » Tue Mar 23, 2010 5:50 pm

Has AFKed so badly >.< Thanks muchly for present :laughing:


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